Pick-up Lines

When was the last time you got picked up by another man?


Just this morning, as I was waiting for the lift, a friend from the office (different department) tapped on my shoulder and said "Hi". I said Hi back and smiled. I was texting someone at that time, and didn't really want to start a conversation. Then I heard him said, 'Wah... cantik nya pagi ni, so elegant..." Haa... elegant?! That's a first (maybe becoz I was wearing your black pearl kut, Gina..). "Oh thank you," I replied (apa lagi nak jawab, kan?)


When we got into the lift, I asked him, how's things at work. He said, everything ok, still at the same place. I told him "You ok, in hot demand..." (memang pun, he's quite an enterprising staff, ramai bosses nak ambil dia kerja). Then he said something strange, "Ya lah... tapi hati I ni ada satu je, bukannya boleh di bahagi-bahagi. Satu bahagian dah bagi kat u...." :)


Mula2 I tak perasan, tau. Then he said it again, "Satu bahagian dah bagi kat u, cuma you je yang belum buat apa2 lagi tentang tu..."


Was he trying to pull a fast one on me? Terus I tak tau apa nak kata lepas tu! Kelu lidah untuk berbicara! Heh.. heh... Senyum je lah, kan? I got off on the 5th floor when in actual fact, my office is located on the 21st floor while his in on the 22nd. Tak nak lah naik sampai ke atas ~ I was feeling rather uncomfortable already. I said my goodbye to him and ciao from the scene.

Just last week, while I was browsing at Ampang Park, this foreigner came to me (I think he's middle eastern, or something). He asked, "Err, excuse me... do you know how long does it take to go to Langkawi from here?" Strange, I thought, to be asked that kind of question in a shopping complex, and not at a bus or railway station. I thought mamat ni sure was trying out his pick-up line, so I malas nak layan. Then he asked me again, "Do you know how long does it take to get to Langkawi from here?" Well, maybe he genuinely wanted to know, so dengan reluctantnya I asked him back, "By plane or car?" He said, "By bus." "5 hours", I said.

“Ahh… Shukran!” he exclaimed. Then he asked me that dreadful question, “Are you local?” Cis! The moment I heard that question, I knew he was trying to chat me up. I tengok je dia and said, “Yes, why?” He said, “Masya’allah… do you work here?” konon2 macam surprise lah. I looked at him and as politely as I could, told him off, “No and GOODBYE!” Boring betullah they all ni. Tak de kerja lain ke? Maybe he thought I was one of those Minah Indon that he could easily pick-up (I got lots of those dulu, masa zaman2 sebelum MrNordin…). Oh pleeeeze… tak kuasa I!


But the best pick-up line I’ve heard so far is this. One day, several years ago, I was going up the escalator in KLCC to meet someone for lunch. I was wearing my office suit and pants, I think. Ramai orang kat escalator tu, and this one guy was standing behind me. Suddenly, I felt a nudge on my back. My first thought was, “Oh no! Pick pocket!” and quickly held on tightly to my handbag. Rupa2nya, this fella wanted to speak to me.


He said, “Hi! Sorry, but I have to tell you this. You are so beautiful.” Eh, apa ke hal ni Yeop? The escalator was still moving up and I was standing there, stiff. Didn’t know how to respond to that except, “Thanks.” He continued, “I’ve been watching you since just now, and I must say you are very beautiful. Are you seeing anyone at the moment?” Heh… heh… do I look like I was single? “Sorry, but I’m married”, I said. “Oh, what a shame…” he said. “But can I be a friend?” he insisted. I looked at him and replied, “Thanks for the compliment, but I’m not interested. Thank you!” And walked away (smiling…)

MrNordin, I still got it, babe... :)