Mother's Day has always been a tricky one for me. You know, I'm not really a mother to MrNordin's children ~ I'm just their stepmum. Since they don't have Stepmum's Day (maybe they should now with the high number of women becoming step mothers!), I've always felt that Mother's Day is not a day for me to celebrate.
However, every year, I would secretly hope that the three children would wish me on that day. Nothing fancy, just a simple wish to make me feel that my presence in the family is being acknowledged and appreciated. And they did, every year, alhamdulillah. Although I knew they must have felt uncomfortable as well, I'm glad they took the initiative to do it.
I remember, my first Mother's Day with them, we were in Bangkok that time, on holiday. They were whispering among themselves whether to get a card for me or not that morning. Since they didn't have the money, they were asking their father to get one for me. But my dear husband at that time, buat tak dengar saja... and I didn't know why. But tak kisah lah tu... tak ada kad pun tak apa, at least they had thought about it. (I couldn't wait for the day to end quickly so I wouldn't feel awkward anymore!)
In the second year (2005), I think we celebrated with my MIL. We all had brunch somewhere (I can't remember where now), but I remember there were a lot of people.
The third year (2006) was a good one. I just gave birth to Nizzar that time (baru seminggu kut), masih dalam pantang. Mother's Day fell on the same date as their father's birthday. So, the girls prepared a Mother's Day cum Birthday lunch for the two of us. They cooked some pasta, Greek salad and fish, I think, which was wonderful. Each one of us had a cake and present. I was so happy that day!
Last year (2007), we didn't really celebrate coz we were sending Nabila to Gopeng to do her matrics. But I had a huge fight with my MIL because she was against us sending the girl there. That was also the day I saw my MIL's true color. Horror!!
The story is this. Before bertolak ke Gopeng, we singgah her house just to say goodbye. Sebelum tu, dia memang dah menyuarakan perasaan tidak puas hati terhadap we all sebab nak hantar budak ni belajar at some "ulu" place like Gopeng. She wanted her grandchild to belajar kat KL ni je, at some private college ke, so she's close to home. But we said no, because the girl made the grades and nak masuk Matrics tu bukannya senang. Anyway, she applied for the placing herself and was accepted among the thousands applications. So, biarlah dia pegi kan?
Tak... mati2 tak bagi hantar (and I really didn't understand her reasons!). So, bila sampai2 je kat rumah tu, terus kena fire. Ni, budak ni nak pegi belajar, nenek dia dah mengamuk2 marah. Eh, apasal pulak? Kononnya we all ni mengenepikan dia... tak sayang kan anak, hantar jauh2 belajar. Entah apa2, kan? Siap hujan (menangis) lagi, "Hati mak ni macam kena hiris.. bla, bla, bla.."
So, I opened my big mouth to pacify her, "Dah lah tu Mak... budak ni nak pegi belajar, Mak marah2 macam ni tak elok lah...". Bagai hali lintar, she turned to me, pointed her finger at me and screamed,
"Engkau jangan masuk campur !!!"
Haah.. jangan masuk campur??
Selama ni, siapa yang jaga budak ni pegi sekolah, makan, pakai segala? All this while, I've been taking care of her grand daughter, and now she's telling me jangan masuk campur??!! I was so mad at her! I nak lawan balik, but I thought better not. She was just being irrational. But I cried my heart out lah, because I felt so sad tak pasal2 kena sembur macam tu. Even my own mother pun tak pernah jerit kat I macam tu, tau? Who does she think she is??
But I tahan je, tears kept streaming down my cheeks. MrNordin was defending me and our decision to send Nabila. After a while, she cooled off but I hated her for doing that. On the way to Ipoh, I cried throughout the journey. Several SMS came in from friends wishing me Happy Mother's Day and thanking me for taking care of the children, lagi lah sebak rasa. Orang lain boleh appreciate my effort, my own MIL couldn't see all that! Hee.. geram betul I!
Despite all that, one consolation I got at the end of the day, Nabila started calling me Mummy that day. Huh... such simple word, but it meant so much to me. It made all the heartache and sadness went away... and made it all worthwhile...
So, this Mother's Day, I only want two things:
- 2-hours of uninterrupted time ~ to watch one DVD of my choice,
- Lunch/brunch with MY own family (sans the in laws, aunties, uncles and orang2 lain yang sewaktu dengannya)