Friday, February 13, 2009

Cerita Cinta

How many guys have you dated or had serious relationships with before you settle down? I’m sure there were many.

When I was young, I never thought I’d have a string of boyfriends. I was plain, boring and dull-looking. I was this fat, short-haired girl with a round face who was only interested in her studies, and nothing else. Nak bergaya memang tak reti. Dah memang budak kampong, nak buat macamana? Baju pun, tak ada yang trendy. Semua baju yang simple-simple saja.

I always envied my friends in STF who were fair and pretty. These “city girls” were so attractive and had many boys wanting to be their friends or pen-pals. They had many suitors but none wanted me.

The desire to befriend a boy was always there but most often than not, I’d be bertepuk sebelah tangan. Just when I thought we were getting serious, he would drop the bomb by saying, “Actually, I don’t quite like you but I like your friend xxx. Can you give me her address?”. How heartbreaking could that be?

Rejection like that was quite common for me during my teenage years. I accepted the fact that I was not one of the popular girls and I should just keep a low profile in the love department. Nevertheless, I still had many crushes (my History teacher included!), but I never confessed my feelings to anyone.

After Form 5, I went on to do my A-Levels in TKC. There, I got to know a boy from an all-boy residential school in Kuala Kangsar who came visiting our school. It so happened, both of us held the same position for our own school’s A-Levels Association, so we had a lot in common.

His name was “K”. He was this tall, dark and handsome 18-year old from St. John’s KL who made my heart fluttered when he first said, “Hello…”. Hee… hee… I had a big crush on him! I thought he was a real charmer.

We wrote to each other a lot during that time. Then I found out that I got to go to the UK first while he had to stay behind one year in KPP. He sent me off at the airport. I still remember, he gave me a red rose and his handkerchief which was sprinkled with his signature perfume, Drakkar Noir, as a parting gift. How romantic was that?

And right infront of my parents, he asked if he could “steal me away” for a while before I took my leave. My mother freaked out, but of course she couldn’t stop us. I still have our last photo together at the Subang Airport, sipping air kelapa from this young coconut using two straws. Our hands intertwined with one another! Hee.. hee… macam real saja!

But, that was the last time I saw him. A few months after that, his letters became more infrequent. When I called, he was never at home. Later I found out from my friends that he had gotten engaged to a girl from Sarawak whom he met at KPP. I was quite heart-broken. I threw away his handkerchief which I had kept close to my bed all throughout my first year at university and tore off all his gambar. Sedihlah…but I guess, it was just not meant to be.

That was my first BF. It lasted for about a year.

My second BF was called N. He was my senior and we went steady during my 2nd year at university. What made me attracted to him was his funny character. He was a real joker and always made me laugh. With him, I knew why girls kept on saying, “He must be able to make me laugh…” whenever asked for desirable characters in a man. That guy just knew how to tickle my fancy.

I don’t quite like to talk about N but he was actually the first person whom I really truly adore. I loved him more than he loved me and I was willing to go out of my way to please him. I was desperate, I guess… for love. Despite all that, he was one person who never said “I love you” to me. Susah sangat nak sebut benda tu! All throughout my 1 year relationship with him, never once did he say the word even though his actions showed that he truly cared about me.

So when he ended the relationship after he returned to Malaysia for good in 1990, I didn’t feel too much loss. Again, for me, it was not meant to be. We just needed each other’s company while it lasted. So it was ok.

After I broke up with N, M came along. M and I had been friends ever since I was still going out with N, but I didn’t realise that M actually got the heart for me. When he found out that I had broken off with N, he confessed that he liked me and asked me if I wanted to be his GF. I was still trying to get over N at that time and wasn’t sure if I should start a new relationship with M. But he was very persistent.

Every time he met me, he would ask me that question, “Will you be my GF?” After much pleading and chasing, I decided to accept his offer and be his GF. In some ways, I liked M too because he was such a gentleman. He was very caring and I knew I could depend on him in times of trouble. So, M became my third BF.

Popular jugak I masa tu, ya? One after another. I didn’t plan for it to happen that way. I never thought anyone would have any interest in me, let alone asking me to be his GF.

M & I were together a long time, 5 years to be exact. He was my first true love and I always thought I’d end up marrying him. We had met both parents (both didn’t like the idea coz we were of different religion), we had talked about marriage, made plans… But itulah… kita hanya merancang… Tuhan yang menentukan. It didn’t work out. He was not ready to get married and I couldn’t wait any longer. We were fighting a lot and towards the end, he just pulled the plug, “I can’t do this anymore…”.

My whole world came crumbling down when that happened. I was in total mess. It took me a long time to get over that break-up. But there was a lesson learnt ~ “GET OUT before it’s too late!” That’s what I always tell my friends, whose BFs seem to be dragging their feet in their relationship.

BF No. 4 was B. He was M’s best friend. I know… bad choice, but I needed someone quickly to help me mend my broken heart.

B was budak baik, very religious. With him, I tak tinggal sembahyang. Terawikh kat Masjid Negara, ok, every night masa bulan puasa. Kalau pegi mana2 pun, we’d stop by somewhere to sembahyang. My mum was very happy with the changes.

But B was very unsure about himself. He always wanted to please his family. I didn’t think we’d get married anyway. He was a good guy but not my type. He told me to stop working and pakai tudung kalau I kawin dengan dia. No way! Ding, dong, ding, dong macam tu, 4 tahun jugaklah I keluar dengan dia. But in the end, he married someone else. A younger girl who became his stay-home wife. Good for him. Now dah ada 5-6 orang anak, I think.

After B, I decided to stop searching for love. I told myself to take a break from this dating game, at least for a while, because I couldn’t afford anymore heart ache. It was not good for my system either. Everyday I would pray that God would eventually grant me a husband, but if tak ada pun, tak apa. I had accepted the fact that I'd probably die an old maid anyway, and it was fine by me.

So, I was single for a while, bumping around in KL with Mdm Tai Tai and my other girlfriends. But without fail, I'd wake up every morning wishing that I'd meet my future husband on that very day..

By a simple twist of fate, after a good 10 months of bumping around, I finally met MrN ~ BF No. 5 and current husband ~ who took me on a whirlwind romance like I'd never experienced before. A dear friend told me, “BJ, you had to kiss a lot of toads first before you found your Prince…”.

How very apt...

Happy Valentine's Day!


Stories of how I met MrN:

Reminiscing Part 1
Reminiscing Part 2
Reminiscing Part 3
Happy Birthday, MrNordin

38 comments:

chics said...

Hey, your story reminded me of my self masadekat stf juga. Every other guy wanted to know my friend but not me.

Kalau nak minat orang, berangan ajela pasal sudah tentu he'll like someone else.

sedeh

MrsNordin said...

Hi Chics,

But I'm sure you have a different story now coz you're so pretty. I'm sure a lot of guys are crazy about you. Bak kata Sarimah, "Petik jari, 10 yang datang tau...."

Hee.. hee... thanks for dropping by!

Anonymous said...

MrsNordin,

after reading all your old stories, u know what, we have many things in common la.....going thru the internet dating, his receding hair, his wife pass away, take care of the kids n masa i kat tkc, i minat some guys and depa minat my frens etc.......

liza

ms hart said...

Hello MrsN! With several 'toads' before you met your prince, you were NOT that plain after all lahhh!!!:)

Lyana Mauseth said...

MrsNordin,

Mmg agaknya lumrah hidup mcm tu kan...i pun jumpa mcm2 jenis katak sebelum jmp husband i ni...dah kwin beranak pinak ni pun ada org masih judge i kenapa i pilih dia..pelik kan?

xpe kak, lagi ramai koleksi bf lagi pandai kita menilai spesis lelaki ni kan :D..at the end kita pandai pilih spesis mana yang terbaik utk kita :D

IBU said...

MrsN,

I can't help thinking, waaa.... 'incestous' jugak lah relationships si BJ ni... kawan dia, bestfriend si anu, kawan si mamat tu.... hahahaha....

But hey... good things come to those who wait! Whirlwind romance lagi.... apa maksud tuh?

hehehe,
e-boo : quite a late bloomer myself

MrsNordin said...

Liza,

Betul ke cerita kita lebih kurang sama? Then WE MUST MEET!!

MrsNordin said...

Ms Hart,

I was a plain Jane, really. But I guess I knew how to get my men. Hee.. hee... your story??

MrsNordin said...

Lyana,

I guessed as much you would have a colourful story to tell as well. Yes, going through these relationships just make us wiser. Lucky husbands! :-)

MrsNordin said...

Ibu,

Ya lah, when I think about it, memang quite sensational. Macam "Friends" pulak! Hee.. hee...

Whirlwind romance? Itu tak boleh cerita in public. Kena take it private. Very sensational!!

kay_leeda said...

MrsN,

Weh...no plain Jane lah you, got a string of BFs mah!! Like you, I used to admire those tall, muka bujur sirih, fair skinned girls as well.

Those school days, ader gak lah minat guys. Ader yg berhasil to be BFs, but more yang tak...heh..heh.

But that Drakkar Noir, memang nostalgic. Lots of cerita cinta that came along with it.

UrbAnWiTch said...

hi again..

wondering when my bumping around will end ..hehehe

A-levels in TKC?
does that qualify u to be an OG?
i am an OG too.

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

Dear MrsN,

Nothing is more parah than having the old toads knocking at your door now..As for me, only one left me but the rest I yang carik pasal, ni ada yg dok pendam perasaan sampai sekarang pun ada dah jadik bujang terlajak..too late la, sapa suruh tak cakap, sekarang I dah beranak-pinak..

I want to write abt my exes too, but i do not want to hurt their feelings as they visit my blog..lyana tau la cerita abt my very colourful past..

Anyway, I believe what took palce in the past has made us wiser, eloklah belajaq benda ni time muda, if sekarang baru nak rasa, it will be too late..

Everyday is a Valentine's day.

IBU said...

MrsN,

U, an OG of TKC? tsk..tsk..tskkk.....

Jelingan manja,
e-boo

Anonymous said...

mrs nordin,
u don't know me but i looove reading your blog esp. this entry

love it!

ida

Kitchen Guardian said...

BJ,

Your story frm para 1 to para 5 (lawyer pakai para para-lah hi hi) sebiji macam cerita i, tapi you dah glamour sekarang..i'm still the old me! i call it classic...

i also had (despite same story above) a number of BF...nanti satu hari i cerita kat you, or maybe in my blog!

yers, during kpp days, hooih time valentine flowers , parfumes, dinners, dating....tak terkata, i duduk bilik aje tak dak boyfriend....

agaknya if you kahwin mat ustaz tu anak you pun dah setengah dozen!! kah kah!

p/s hope to tunaikan janji lunch wt you nxt week..inshaallah!

Kak Teh said...

Mrs N, I am afraid I awas one of those girls who didnt have any bf until I met my husband. There were those that took me out on one or two dates that I couldnt count as boyfriends, there were close ones as well - but not BF materials, but there was one - and this is important which explains why ididnt have any unil I met my husband. This one remained a Bf in my mind only. I'd admire him from afar, knew where his house was, where he worked. it was a schoolgirl's crush at its worst. It lasted 7 years. I never opened my heart to anyone else,,and then when I met and spoke to him, he spoke bad english...aiyaaa, that is so cannot. That was it...until of course i met my awang goneng.

Aida said...

BJ,

U are right, U have to kiss alot of toads (jerks and the like) to find ur prince. I went trhough that too. In the end its understanding yourself and what U need in a man.

Some are so lucky to find the ONE on the first try, others have to go through heartache and heart break. Makes for better blogging I say ehhehehe

Happy Belated V Day friend.

wanshana said...

BJ,

Cerita sekolah tu, samalah kita. I had a crush way back then when we were in STF - biasaklah tu...when there were inter-school competitions held in STF, etc, and we would have boys coming over, etc. But, that was it - just a crush which ended when I found out that the boy was interested in one of our glamorous friends. Aduuhhh...Frust. Hehehe...Nasib baik I tak pursue. If not, my life would be very different today. Hehehe!

But, I think what happened then really made me think that I was not pretty - a VERY plain Jane who would never have a boyfriend ever. Little did I realize then that God had much better plans for me :)

Then my Cerita Chenta began, and the rest is history ;)

Thanks for sharing your love journey with us, BJ. So, the colourful ones...with multicoloured toads some more! And now, you're with your Prince Charming...Aaaawwwwhhh...

tireless mom said...

Dear BJ

In toilets at Bolck D ada banyak toads. You know that kan. Rather than shying away from them you should have kissed them, then you will find many guys waiting for you on their knees. : )

Tak pe lah dah 5 BF baru dapat husband. Ada some til la ni tak kahwin lagi kan.

Happy Valentine's day dear.

mrs hafiidz nadia said...

^_^ i love your stories!!u shud be a writer..citer pasal mrsnordin yang pertama tu rasa nak nangis je(well ya,me agak terlambat menghidu blog ini)..thnx to chics cuz recommend your blog at hers..

Madam Tai Tai said...

Hi MrsN,

You definitely have more cerita cinta than me! How lucky you are and how boring my life was!

I have known you as long as your love story with your second BF started. I took me a long while to figure out who he was. Hahaha...itu nama betul dia rupanya! Terlupa pulak. Yup...they are all horrible toads, except for your third one. He is a toad alright, but I still have the soft spot for him in my heart. Soft spot for you and him lah! You know me - I'm biased!

BUT, you did find your Prince Charming at the end. And I love him for loving you very much.

Happy Valentine's Day, girlfren.

Anonymous said...

Mrs N,
no wonder stevie wonder. Tho in cyber world, I always feel I can relate to your stories... rupa-rupanya script kisah 'chenta' pun lebih kurang sama saja. Not popular girl, yang kita mau, tak mau kat kita. And once we bloomed (hehe which was agak lambat berbanding sesetengah gadis kota) we embark on our trial and cruise before we finally settled with an 'experienced' captain. Now you have 3 senior crews and 1 junior and me 1 senior and 1 junior ;)
One of these days I think I should start writing my love stories jugak la, alphabetical sambil mendengar 'tiada lagi kidungmu' dendangan lefthanded. hahaha

hugs and kisses
DeeDee

MrsNordin said...

Kay,

Drakkar Noir tu was a classic, kan? Hee... Hee... bau dia memang mengancam! Nasib baik other BFs tak pakai that perfume. Kalau tidak, confuse jugak, kan?

MrsNordin said...

Urban Witch,

I don't qualify as an OG coz I was only there for 2 years.

Your bumping around will end when you reach 32, like me? Heh... heh... that's a bloody long time to bump around!

MrsNordin said...

Ida,

Pretty girls like you will hardly get dumped. Usually, they will do the dumping. That's the rule of the game. Lucky you!

Yes, I also believe all these relationships make us wiser. Tak cuba, tak tahu, kan? I tell my kids the same thing: try at least two before you decide. Then you'll have a nice love story to tell.

MrsNordin said...

Ibu,

No, I'm not.

MrsNordin said...

Hi Ida,

Thanks. Ada terasa sipi2 ke bila baca cerita I ni? :-)

MrsNordin said...

KG,

Wah... awakpun ramai peminat ya di suatu waktu dahulu? Boleh lah cerita kat your blog. Tapi jangan sampai Dad of 5 naik jealous sudah. Nanti dia bukak cerita cinta dia pulak, tak boleh tidur you dibuatnya! Hee.. hee...

MrsNordin said...

Kak Teh,

Aiya... bad English is so no, no in a BF! Sure K.Teh frust punya tu. Setelah menunggu selama 7 tahun, tiba2 dengar dia cakap, terus out! Alamak... spoil betul!Hee... hee... itu lah yang dikatakan, cinta yang tak kesampaian... :-)

MrsNordin said...

Aida,

The reason why I wrote that piece is actually to remind my kids that not all are lucky in love. Some, like you said, jumpa sorang terus kawin. But some, like us, had to go through so many trials in love before we met our jodoh.

That's life, I suppose...

MrsNordin said...

Shana,

You were no plain Jane in school, ok? I always thought you were in the same league as the popular girls. And you met Haizal in Form 4! What does that say about you? Terror... memang terrorr!!

MrsNordin said...

TM,

I know the toads dalam toilet Block D tu. Eeee... I had a bad experience once! Tapi toad macam tu sapa yang nak... asyik mengendap orang mandi je, nak buat apa!

MrsNordin said...

Dear Mrs Hafidz,

I'm glad you like my stories. Alah... ini semua kisah benar, bukan direka2. I love sharing them with friends.

Thanks for dropping by and have a nice day!

MrsNordin said...

Madam,

Happy Valentine's Day again!

M.... sometimes I do wonder about him but that's about it. Those were the days... it was just not meant to be.

MrsNordin said...

DeeDee,

Yes, why don't you write your stories? I really look forward to reading them!

Tiada Lagi Kidungmu was my favourite masa kat TKC. I even bought the cassette, hari2 dengar. Lefthanded really rocked that time. But now that Nash has started wearing suits, macam tak kena pulak.

Busybody said...

Mrs N,

I gave Drakkar Noir to my hubby (then BF) as first b'day gift dulu ( if I remember correctly). 5 boyfriends? Terra juga you ni!

I dulu pun plane Jane juga..

My hubby has this fren, the fren went to this all boys boarding school in Ipoh. Now he's a very succesful businessman. So I have a fren yg ramai BFs from that school dulu, she said to me, how come dia tak kenal that guy before..so I told her, the moral of the story is, we must teach our daughters not to cari BFs yg popular sgt like sportsman..Ha!Ha!

MrsNordin said...

Busybody,

You pun ada cerita pasal Drakkar Noir, ya? Hee.. hee.... does he still use it?

Yalah, buat apa cari BF yang popular at school... nanti kena berebut dengan girls lain. Cari yang pandai belajar, terjamin masa depan. Ya tak?