Dilemma

I have become more and more hesitant to write these days. Not that I don’t have anything to write ~ I do! It’s just that I’m beginning to feel that my blog has defeated its purpose.

In blogsphere, your life is an open secret. Everyone is welcomed to read it unless you take it private. I don’t mind that, really… my stories are to be shared.

But recently, it has come to my attention that some unexpected readers have been frequenting my blog and it made me wonder whether some things which I don’t want some people to know will become public knowledge anyhow.

Nadim told me his classmates read my blog and they enjoyed it, it seemed. Then a couple of times, at private functions, I bumped into people whom I’ve never met before and they told me they love my blog. Some of my officemates from different departments read it too (I don’t know how they knew!) but I sure hope my boss doesn’t!

At first, I was quite thrilled. I like it when I hear people say, “You must be MrsNordin!” or “Hi, MrsNordin!”. Rasa macam celebrity pulak!

But after a while, it got me thinking, “Oopps… have I written anything that would offend anyone?” “Have I written anything that shouldn’t be known to this person or that person?” “Should I delete this posting?”

It’s not fun any more.

I'm still thinking how I should go about doing it. Until I find an answer to that, I won't post any new stories.

'Til then my friends... adios!

Comments

Kak Teh said…
mrs N, yes, the blog is open to the rest of the whole wide world. we dont know who is reading, I have had readers who claimed they know my children and what i did or where I went. it can be scary, but i think we choose what to write and we try to choose wisely. You dont have to stop entirely.
Tak syokla kalau Mrs N tak ada.
Spices of Life said…
I went through the same phase as you. Once we blog our life is an open book.. at one time I hesitated to blog. But then to write is what I enjoy doing most, and I do not let anyone take my joy away from me.. By the way I love your train of thoughts. keep up the good work.
Anonymous said…
MrsN,

Hi kak... i enjoy reading your blog.. but i myself dont have my own blog coz i think am not enuff in writing... ;(

i'd say that your writing is very good, enjoy sangat reading your blog...
Naz in Norway said…
MrsN,
I second Kak Teh's opinion that we choose what we write and we try to choose wisely.
I have made a conscious decision when I started blogging that there are certain things I will never write about or hint on. I like to think of those as my *aurat*. So although some people think that they know me, there are still a lot that they don't and may never will. I love writing and I think you do too. Keep writing, MrsN. I will surely miss your presence in blogsphere. Take care :)
dah h pulak...
sorang lagi nak menyorok!

tak best lah macam ni..BJ...dont do this to us...presiden MB tak leh buat cam ni..

BJ..apa apa pun akak hormati keputusan kamu...tapi jangan lama lama ya....nanti kalau aku rindu, aku cari kamu sampai ke rumah....
kay_leeda said…
MrsN,

I am with Naz on this. Hence, there are things that will not make it to blogland. Eventhough I like sharing my experiences with others, certain things are just meant for the eyes and ears of those who are very close to me.

No worries, take a break if you need to give it a thought. Hope you'll continue writing. Who else would dare write about "bulu-bulu thingy" if not you:))

Take care gurl.
Anonymous said…
MrsN,

As long as you don't write things that you don't want people you know to know. . .(how's that for confusing sentences). For that, you need to be anonymous.

It truly is a small world - I tried to stay away from things I don't want repeated later (or things I DON'T want my mom to know, even if she doesn't have a computer). Keep writing though. . .
wanshana said…
BJ,

I'm sure all bloggers feel the same way at some point, and I agree with Kak Teh, Naz and the rest - we choose what to write and we try to choose wisely.

To me, if our nawaitu when we write is just to share what's going on in our life, I don't think we should be scared of what people may think of us.

Hanna's friends read my blog, and I believe some of her teachers do, too. And Haizal has also been approached by his staff, his friends, and also some from the public who attend his talks, etc saying that they read my blog!

I CRINGE when I think about it, but, I don't think my blog contents are offensive (intentionaly, that is) and like azlEda said I don't think I will let that stop me from writing :)

We write what we want to share with others. And those we don't want to share, remain not to be shared :)

Jangan bertapa lama-lama sangat okay, BJ? ;)
sarahH said…
dear Mrs N,

I love reading ur writings, silently.

Personally, reading blogs is like attending the 'school of life'. So please jangan tutup your 'sekolah' okay! :-)

p/s: happy belated mother's day. Nizzar is soo cute!
Anonymous said…
Mrs N,

Please keep at it BJ. Reading yours is therapeutic. I said this once here before. Take a break by all means.

Nothing beats honesty. You are on the right nawaitu. Any topic is good reading from you.

Jim
Rozi said…
Dear MrsN, I have been your blog silent reader for quite sometime now. I enjoyed every entry you made. To me reading someone's blog is like reading someone's diary...which so happened to be a private affair.
But in cyberspace, the "openess" (ada ke word tu??) will often make us fee sick...people go on bombarding us, if they read our blog...they will have a little slack" look kat kita kalau entry kita dia org tak suka.
Majority yg rajin membaca blog ni org pompuan, so faham2 aja la ..yg dok past sarcastic remarks pun org pompuan kan.
I don't keep my nlog active anymore..coa to me when I write in my blog, it is mainly to share my thoughts and ideas, but most of the time...the readers will pass bad remarks.
But my advice to you...jgn stop berblog..I enjoy it personally...cuma..klau boleh kurangkan citer pasal your otherhalf and any family conflicts.more on everday life...maybe about your hobby, or about your little boy.
OK just doing my share.Don't stop blogging
MA said…
MrsN

I can understand the dilemma very much. That was why I made the conscious effort to be below the radar and keeping blogging life and real life separate. Having said that - what other said about choosing what you write and sharing what you can is your call, really.
aida yurani said…
Ala kak yati, tak syok lah kalau you stop writing. Alahai.... Like the others said, perhaps, just after writing it, tengok balik, check mana yang patut di tapis-tapis. I pun dulu kat my old blogspot siap ada orang yang tak kenal I kutuk-kutuk lagi. BUt now I take the concept "hang suka, hang baca, hang tak suka, hang jangan baca, bukan aku charge pun kau nak baca aku punya ramblings, tak suka kalau, pi lah baca blogsite lain" hehehehe.

Now I just write what I feel. And I know I have many-many-many silent readers. There will be days when I kutuk or marah them, best part, they email pesonally and let me know how they feel. And somehow, we get along after that. :)

adat blogging, ada suka, ada yang tak suka, ada yang dengki, ada yang sakit hati tak pasal2.

I hope you will continue writing.
min said…
hi mrsN.... i hv been ur silent reader for quite some time. n enjoying evry post of urs.. i suppose u hv ur reasons but i must praise u for ur writing. u r good... i wwish u cld continue writing... maybe it doesnt hv to be abt ur personal life.. just general topics. we r abt the same age, we were overseas grads, we got married late (by choice, of coz..hehehe) we hv so many thngs in common. im pretty sure, im not the only one sharing these with u... i can relate to ur stories..
i just hope u continue with ur post. take care...
busymum100 said…
MrsN,

I know what you mean. I have instances when I want to write something that's on my mind, but I have to refrain from doing so because the nature of my job does not encourage me to do so.

There are also time when I want to "bersungut" but I know org2 yg berkenaan read my blog regularly.

So what I do, is still write what I feel, but in a more "berlapik" manner. it's my blog, and I write to let out what I feel, but then, at the same time takde lah nk put my relationship with those ppl in an awkward manner..

so, kena balance lah.. And no, I DON'T THINK you should stop blogging! It's your outlet and your corner, not theirs.

All the best, and happy birthday to MrN.

BTW, feast your eyes on some of the pix that I've uploaded on my blog *wink*

-smz
Hi President MB,

I hope you wouldn't stop but again it's entirely up to you. I'm going to see you more often now so I shall not miss your stories so much, because I know we are going to have lots of 'Dome/Gloria Jeans' sessions together.

However, I know many of your fans out there will. Your blog has certainly added color to our sometimes gray dull lives.
mama said…
dearie

i really love reading your blog. u definitely do not know me, but i hope you would allow 'us' to continue sharing your ups and downs.i'm a working mum who's too shy to write (or talk), and i find your blog so fascinating and yes, i do like yr train of thoughts,and reading your blog makes my day, you know what i mean?
i do know some of your friends though, and that's how i got to know of your blog.

and to mdm tai tai, in case you are reading this, i'm a fan of yours too, until you 'block' your blog. how can i register to be a member of your 'official' fan club?

keep writing dearie(s)......
please! and thank you.

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