Thursday, January 01, 2009

Welcoming the Year 2009

1st January 2009. A new year has begun. How do I feel about it? Anxious ~ that’s the best word to describe it. The economic uncertainty, the health condition of family members, financial issues, MrN’s career prospects… all these were playing on my mind at this present moment.

I believe this is going to be a tough year. We all have to play our cards right. No more lavish spending, no more impulsive buys, no more extravagance. For the first time in many years, I’ve set myself a few resolutions to guide me through this year: 1) eat out less, 2) be more spendthrift, and 3) seek spiritual guidance.

Less eating out is obvious ~ eat home-cooked food. I save money and my family gets to eat healthier food. I noticed that in my in-laws: they are very healthy at 73 years of age. Why? Because my MIL makes sure her family eats home-cooked meals. She doesn’t eat out (only on special occasions like her birthday, but even then, she’s very picky about her food), choose only the best fish/meat/vege for her dishes, and very particular about what you eat.

MrN used to tell me, when he was schooling, his mum made sure he ate in front of her during recess at the staff room (she was a teacher at the same school at that time). “Jangan haraplah dapat makan makanan kantin…”, he reminisced. She’s tough, but her discipline towards what she/her family eat ensures her long life.

When I think about what my family eats, Ya Allah… rasanya tak lama boleh hidup! The amount of junk food, take away, and dining out that we indulged in are sure proof of a not-so-healthy lifestyle. Dahlah tak exercise!

Junk food and take away are easy, especially for lazy wife/mother like me. Bila malas nak masak, beli je dari luar or order take away. And you know how outside food are prepared, right? High in grease, high in salt, but the taste is not that great after all. Home cooked meals are always the best and they are healthier. So, I resolve to cook more often in 2009 and reduce eating out. In other words, eat healthier food.

Be more spendtrift ~ has always been my resolution at the beginning of the year. But as time goes by, I somehow tend to forget about it. This year, I resolve it will be more long term in nature.

Seek spiritual guidance ~ this one is rather personal. Of late, I’ve been questioning my purpose in life. What am I here for? Religious wise, I’m not very religious. I only do what’s basic and that’s about it. But everyday before I go to sleep, I’ll be asking myself, is this all there is to it? Is this what my life is all about?

I feel empty inside, I’m not at peace with myself. I long for that contentment which says, I know what I’m doing, and I know what I’m praying to. I lack the spiritual knowledge that can take me to a higher level as a Muslim. I suppose sembahyang dan berzikir will help, but I just don’t feel it whenever I do it. And that worries me.

So far, Alhamdulillah, God has not tested me to the point beyond bearable. And I’m thankful for that. I must have done something right somewhere. But I believe, there will come a time when luck will not be on my side anymore. And when that happens, what am I going to do?

I look at my children, they are all growing up. One will turn 20 this year. I also have a little one who will only turn 3 this year. They all look up to me and to my husband for guidance. What can I offer them? What can I teach them?

In our race for modernization, we tend to forget the reason for our being. We tend to take it for granted that whatever we do is all channeled towards one thing, that is, worldly materials. And this is wrong.

When I look at some of my friends who are continuously seeking knowledge, both religiously and spiritually, I envy them. I want to be like them. I want to fill up this emptiness within me with spiritual knowledge and guidance that will make me come to peace with myself. How am I going to do it? That is something which I need to find out.

For a start, I can see my husband slowly moving towards that direction and I’m glad. He is actually a very knowledgeable man, religiously and spiritually. But he’s a slow starter. As I said, it’s all due to our race for worldly materials.

He comes from a religious family background. His great, great grandfather was a very pious man, well-known for spreading the tarikat Ahmadiah. I’m not sure how important this man was, but the makam/tanah perkuburan on a hill in Seremban is named after him. I guess, he must be very important.

So from my husband, I know I can seek the proper guidance. I hope and pray that I will be able to fulfill this need to be a better person, both religiously and spiritually. Insyaallah...

43 comments:

Ezza Aziz said...

Abah saya cakap perempuan senang masuk syurga..pertama taat kepada Allah
kedua taat kepasa suami.Tapi kenapa dalam neraka tu ada banyak perempuan...
Sebab dia tak ikut yang 2 perkara tu!
Bila fikir2 kan..betul la tu..

Ekonomi merudum tu dugaan dari Allah. Tapi terbuka hati untk berubah kepada yang lebih baik adalah HIDAYAH dari Allah. Saya pun sedang berusha ke arah itu...semuga kedatangan tahun baru ini dapat menghijrah kan diri ini kepada yang lebih baik.
MrsN...Selamat tahun baru dari kami semua

Kitchen Guardian said...

just one breath frm me....inshaallah, alhamdulillah!

Ummi365 said...

i wish you all the best and semoga tercapai whatever resolution that you have in mind.. :)

Kak Teh said...

Selamat Tahun Baru Mrs N dan keluarga semoga apa yang diminta dan diharap, dimakbul dan tercapai.

zarin said...

hi MrsN

ur 1st n 2nd resolutions sama mcm I.
Hopefully akan tercapai lah hendaknya ye..

tireless mom said...

Hi BJ

On the spiritual note, slowly but surely. Take one thing at a time, insha Allah.

Happy New Year dear

Anonymous said...

Didn't know that MrN is from Seremban. I am from the same family tree. How can I get in touch with you guys?

the principal said...

totally agree with tireless mom-one thing at a time...

it's a blessing "Allah has not tested you to the point beyond bearable",...semoga terus menjadi insan yg bersyukur...

happy new year, mrs nordin

Anonymous said...

Mrs N,

Have a good year ahead! Semoga kita semua tabah menghadapi segala cabaran dan diberkati Allah sentiasa.

Busybody

mumsie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
myheartbleeds said...

MrsN, I am touched by this entry!!

May Allah grants all of us more of His hidayah in 2009 and all the best in your spiritual journey... take baby steps, ok??

wanshana said...

BJ,

Insya Allah, apa yang dido'akan akan dimakbulkan olehNya. And every one of us must take little baby steps to achieve whatever it is that we wish, hope or work for, especially when it concerns our spiritual fulfilment, dear.

You're not alone in holding to this resolution. I'm with you, too. And I know so many people out there have the same resolution as we step into the new year.

All the best to all of us. Insya Allah dibukakan lebih luas hati kita, dan dipertingkatkan lagi tahap keimanan kita, dan Allah SWT memberikan HidayahNya to all of us. Amin. Insya Allah.

MA & Brood said...

Happy New Year Mrs N.


I have a few resolutions spiritually too like you.Insya Allah slowly but surely we will keep on improving ourselves to become the best person we can be.


However my no 1 resolution is to taper down the circumference of my "middle kingdom" :P

D.N.A.S said...

Kak BJ,
Happy New Year!
Lebih kurang sama lah 2009 resolution kita. Nak masak dengan lebih rajin for the family. Perhaps we should exchange recipes sometimes, kan?

ms hart said...

MrsN - sama lah macam Wanshana kata. I think of death almost all the time, but then I know I haven't done enough to bring along with me. It feels good to know that many friends are also thinking of the same thing - the preparation for the real life. Let's doa sama-sama, ok.

kay_leeda said...

MrsN,

He listens, He forgives and He guides. InshaAllah....

MrsNordin said...

Ezza,

Betul kata abah Ezza tu. MrN pun ada bagitau I macam tu. So, nampaknya, I kena lebihkan taat pada suami dan kurang kan 'husband bashing' from now on! Hee.. hee..!

Selamat Tahun Baru to you and family too!

MrsNordin said...

Kitchen Guardian,

Thanks. I need all the support I can get.


Ummi,

Thanks.. :-)

MrsNordin said...

Kak Teh,

Selamat Tahun Baru to you and family too. May all your wishes come true this year.



Zarin,


1st and 2nd resolution sama? Hopefully we both will be able to achieve them! Happy New Year!

MrsNordin said...

Tireless Mum,

Yes, I'll definitely take baby steps. Thanks for your advice.


Anon,

Hi! Yes, he's from Seremban. You can get in touch with us by e-mail ladyluck_m2001@yahoo.com. I look forward to your correspondence!

MrsNordin said...

Hi Busybody,

Thanks!! Happy new year to you too. And may all your wishes come through this year!

MrsNordin said...

Myheartbleeds,

Thanks. Will definitely take baby steps. I'm a slow starter too. You take care!

MrsNordin said...

Shana,

Thanks for your thoughts. As we get older, I guess we need to go back to basics. Life is not all about "duniawi", the after life pun kena tahu juga.

Happy New Year! May you have a good one this year!

MrsNordin said...

Ma,

Reducing "that part" has always been my resolution year after year. But liat betul lah...

My angan2 nak dapat badan macam Saloma, boleh? Hee.. hee...

MrsNordin said...

Hi DNAS,

Thanks for dropping by. Sure we can exchange recipes, but I think, it'll be more like I copy your recipes you, kut! I bab memasak ni ada kurang sikit, nasib baik ada maid yang pandai masak. Kalau tidak, susah jugak...

Happy New Year!

MrsNordin said...

Ms Hart,

True! I think about death all the time too. But the one that really made me sedar was when I watched that upacara pengkebumian Tuanku Jaafar hari tu. Insaf, babe!!

MrsNordin said...

Hi Kay,

I'll surely remember that. Happy New Year to you and familt too!

tearose said...

Salam adikku, Ida...Semoga tahun ini kita semua mendapat hidayat dari Tuhan. You are actually lucky for having this spritually thoughts and conversation at the very early days of Maal Hijrah

Anonymous said...

Salam, may I suggest that kalau ada ceramah agama kat office you once a week on Friday ke, just attend it, it helps because kita tak boleh belajar sendirian, kalau dengar ceramah once a week or even once a month pun akan berkesan dan rasa keindahannya. I promise you , you akan rasa lebih tenang when you can really feel that Allah sangat menyayangi you dan Allah befirman bahawa "selangkah engkau mendekatiKu Aku akan mendekatimu seribu langkah" lebih kurang macam tu lah! Good Luck.

2x5

jabishah said...

Mrs. N,

Happy New Year!

I have always loved your posts & this in particular is an eye opener. Thank you dear for sharing. Like others, I agree that we need to take it one thing at a time. InsyaAllah...

Superwomanwannabe said...

BJ. tak sangka your ambition no 1 and 2 sama dengan I.

1. I will try to reduce eating out. And cook for my kids. Even though they hate food yang tak masak 10mins before they eat. definitely too much convenience food.

2. I rasa we feel empty sbb tak da connection sebab tak KENAL. Kita ni buat by rote je (better lah dari tak buat tapi, can be so much better) I hope this year can get to know again the religion I was born into. insyallah...tak kenal maka taak cinta kan.

Good luck to you and me!

MrsNordin said...

Hi Tearose,

What a nice surprise...! Mula2 tu, terkejut jugak. Eh, siapa pulak ni? Not many people know me by that name, Ida. Takkan makcik Rahmah baca blog pulak! Hee.. hee... Rupa2nya, it's you!

Thanks for dropping by. I've been reading your blog as well, tapi just skimming through. It's sure a good way to keep in touch, huh?

Take care!

MrsNordin said...

2x5,

Thanks for your advice. I've been thinking of doing the same thing. At my office ni memang ada kelas agama once or twice a week. My office mates ramai jugak pegi. I shall make it a point to go as well.

Thanks again!

MrsNordin said...

Hi Jabishah,

Happy New Year to you too! Orang yang "cetek" ilmu macam I ni memang have to take it slow. But insyaallah i'll get there...

Take care!

MrsNordin said...

SW,

Yeay! Same resolutions! But the question is, who'll be doing the cooking at home? Us or our husbands ~ since they all memang lagi terror masak dari we all, kan? He.. he...

On No. 3, it's true what you said. Tak kenal maka tak cinta. I want to gain a deeper understanding of it all so I know what I'm doing.

Have a good trip to Singapore!!

bella said...

Happy New Year MrsN!
Wonderful resolutions, some of them are quite the same as my hopes for 2009.
On the spiritual side, samalah kita...actually this was one of the main reason I chose my Mr.I...hehehe...all the best, and good health for you and family...
bella

Eta My said...

Dear Bj..di sinin agak lambat nak ucap Slmt tahun baru pada di sinun..

Had enjoyed reading your past ramblings....

all nice things plus good health for everybody ..

tata!

MY HOMESTAY said...

A'kum..Happy New Year 2009. I like all your articles and the honest comments. Actually I have news about the orphan child in Kelantan. Please visit my blog n see what inside..

Deen

Anonymous said...

Mrs N
One of the blogs I regularly pay a visit to is www.almanar-nuri.blogspot.com . Perhaps reading some of its postings will help you understand the side of life you are being shielded from. Once I thought I was living a very ordinary life, just like any others around me. I could see the mountain tops towering above. Then something gave, and below hidden by the bushy green, I began to see how high and mighty I was.Now I realise climbing downhill is tougher than uphill.
Anak Negeri Jati

MrsNordin said...

Hi Bella,

Thanks for your warm wishes. Let's hope for a better year this in all aspects of our lives. Good luck!

MrsNordin said...

Hi Eta,

I wish you a Happy New Year too! May you be blessed, especially with a new baby in tow.

MrsNordin said...

Hi Deen (Homestay),

Thanks for dropping by. I've visited your blog but I haven't read all the articles. But from the few that I've read, I think you are a very noble person. Will surely check it out often from now on.

Thanks again and Happy New Year to you and family!

MrsNordin said...

Hi Anak Negeri Jati,

I'll surely check out the link. It's true what you said, going down hill is more challenging than going uphill. It's harder but once you reach your destination, you'll feel more fulfilled.

Thanks again and Happy New Year!