Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Home Alone

Yesterday, for the first time ever, I left Nizzar home alone with his two older siblings while I went to work. No choice, because the old maid dah balik kampong while the new maid will only be back tomorrow from Tanjung Balai.

I’ve never left Nizzar alone at home with his brother or sisters. There was always a maid present because I didn’t trust the kids with the little boy.

From my observation, I noticed that the older kids had very little patience for their little brother. Even in my presence, budak kecik tu selalu kena marah or yelled at for being naughty or demanding.

The older kids prefer to do their own things without interference from the little one. The maid will be the one looking after him the whole day.

The older children never seemed to want to do anything around the house except eat, sleep and do their own things. Suruh jaga adik will be met with much hesitation.

So, now you know why I was paranoid about leaving him alone with his kakak and abang? I always had this cynical feeling that if I left him alone under their care, his stepbrother and sisters would torture him like in Cinderella. No, I dare not risk it!

But in the past few days, we have been deprived of a maid since my old one had eventually gone home last Friday while the new one still hasn’t returned from Tg Balai after more than a week. The agent said, esok baru sampai. So, I had no choice but to leave the 3 kids at home alone.

I was very worried. What if the little boy threw a tantrum? What if he misbehaved? Will he be punished by his sister/brother? What if there was an accident and the house was on fire? All ridiculous thoughts crossed my mind.

My husband said they’d be fine although I knew deep inside he was a bit apprehensive about leaving them alone at home. But we had no choice and we didn't want to menyusahkan orang lain.

On Sunday night, we had a trial run when my husband and I had to join some people for a surprise birthday party in PJ. I was reluctant to go but I told myself, let this be a tryout. If not now, bila lagi?

When we left home that evening, the little boy was playing with his big brother. He didn’t even realize that we were gone. During the party, I kept on thinking about the kids at home, whether they were ok or not. I had my Blackberry next to me all the time just in case Home called, but to my surprise, there was none. When I called home to check, Nabila said everything was ok. The boy was still playing with Nadim.

Hmm…strange….

When we got home later that night, the boy was still awake, lying on the floor in my bedroom, watching TV with Nabila. He looked at me and pulled a long face. Merajuklah tu sebab kena tinggal! But he was fine after that and I was happy that they all survived the 4 hours that we were gone.

And yesterday was the real thing...

I left home at 8.30am, after leaving behind a “To Do List” for the two older kids:

To Do (Mon, 21/12)

1) Take out the wing chair yang dah kena kencing kucing to dry
2) Lipat kain (Nabila)
3) Masak nasi (Nadim)
4) Bagi Nizzar ubat (Nabila)
5) Note: When changing Nizzar, just use a wet towel to wipe his face and body. DO NOT bathe him!

I drove to office nervously because I wasn't sure how the day would turn out to be. In the office, I waited for phone calls from home but there was none. When I spoke to Nadim later, he said everything was fine. No worries. Then it was quiet for the rest of the afternoon.

When I reached home at 6.15pm, the house was quiet. Nabila came out to open the door for me and when I asked, where was the little boy? She said he was sleeping. Sleeping?? You must be kidding! Budak tu susah nak tidur siang, tau! So I went upstairs to check, and yes indeed he was sleeping.

The house was in order. Nothing was broken, all chores were completed.

To tell you the truth, I was so happy to see Nadim's and Nabila's faces yesterday evening. The first thing I said was, "You survived!!"

I was very impressed that they managed to look after the house and their little brother on their own devices. The kitchen was clean, the rubbish bins were empty, the wing chair dah kering and kain dah berlipat.

The only complaint I heard was from Nabila who now realizes that melipat kain is hard work. “I hate lipat kain!!”, she said. Don’t we all? Hee.. hee…

Again, they caught me by surprise, these kids. They’ve proven that my worries were unfounded, and that they are capable of taking care of their little brother when I’m not around.

I was also surprised when they told me they had no problem giving ubat to Nizzar coz when I tried, that boy put up a very strong resistance by kicking his feet and clamping his teeth to avoid being fed with the cough syrup! Aiyoo.. what does that tell you?

Anyway, we went out for dinner last night to give them a treat for a job well done.

Actually, life without a maid can be a blessing because in some ways, it does bring the family closer. Each family member would have their own role and duties and together we do it to help each other out.

Like the other night after we came back from the party, I had to hang the clothes out to dry in the backyard. It was almost midnight but there we were, all 5 of us in the backyard helping each other out. Nabila helped me with the clothes, Nadim helped his Baba feeding the angsa, while Nizzar sat in his toy car watching us. You can never get this when the maid is around!

It’s just a different feeling when there’s just you and your family. It’s nicer. But of course it’s tiring. The kids can’t wait for the maid to come back. I can’t wait for her too so I don’t have to do ironing!

House work is really hard work, so I have very high respect for full time housewives. Imagine doing all those chores alone… day in day out. Letih !!

That’s why I always tell my kids, help out whenever you can even when we have a maid. Don’t expect the maid to do everything. Dahlah dia kena bersihkan rumah, basuh baju, lipat baju, iron baju, basuh tandas, basuh pinggan, kemas bilik, masak, jaga baby, jaga pets… banyaknya kerja! Even I can’t do all that on my own! That’s why we must help her.

Anyway, today is the second day they are home alone. No calls so far, so I guess they are ok.

Alhamdulillah…

18 comments:

Naz said...

MrsN,
Great kids :)
I'm an advocate for no-maid households but once in Msia, I do enjoy the extra help ;D
haha!

Lyana Mauseth said...

nak tergelak i baca your story...masa i was going to norwegian class, i left odin and emil at home with the father and the brother...when i came back i saw odin was walking mcm angsa so i checked...diaper dia terbalik!! abang dia yg salinkan dgn gf dia!!..ayooo yg lelaki tu i pahamlah kan..mmg slow, but the gf shud know lah how to put on the diaper...budak2!!

Zie said...

Hi Mrs N,
I can so relate to this. Everytime I had to leave my kids overnight (with maid), I got a bit apprehensive and left a long list of instruction. Bila I balik they all will cakap everything fine, no problem pun...

Eta My said...

BJ..bila terpaksa..semua menjadi ...especially bila ak ade pilihan...

ye..letih!.itu pasal kita tak delah buat everyhthing..everyday..selalunya ambil yang wajib..like laundry, cook and sapu plus mop...etc...ishhh..tak habis cerita pasal house chores nih...

and seronok baca u and the kids help each other out..

and..napa tak leh kasi mandikan boboi?

sebenarnya kanBj...kakak dan abgnya boleh dipercayai laa....

DadaIQ said...

BJ
We experienced the same situation when Bibik went back for almost 3 months. Life was difficult and tough but we survived. The boys and their abah helped me with the house cores. Tapi kenalah bagi upah RM5 tolong cuci toilet. But at least they learnt basuh kasut sekolah and kemas bilik.

The truth is we prefer to go to work than stay at home, right?

MrsNordin said...

Naz,

An extra hand would be most helpful. Not only for house work but also for a peace of mind whenever we have to leave the kids at home. At least ada orang jaga depa.

MrsNordin said...

Lyana,

Ha! Ha! Kesian si Odin... macamana boleh terbalik diaper tu?

But these are the things that we take for granted, that everyone knows how to pakaikan baby diaper. Actually not. Luckily for my kids, pandai jugak diaorang pakaikan pampers adik dia. Tak bocor lah.. :)

MrsNordin said...

Zie,

I guess all mothers are like that. Always worrying over the unknown, and always think that they can't survive without us. But actually not. They'll be fine without us, really..

Thanks for dropping by.

MrsNordin said...

Eta,

I guess you are right. Buat mana yang "wajib" sahaja. Kalau nak buat semua, pengsan lah jawabnya. Like you, dengan baby lagi... I'm sure it's quite trying. But ada berkat disebalik tu semua, Eta... insyaallah...

On your question, I tak bagi mandikan boboi sebab dia demam & selsema. But yesterday macam dah ok dah, so I dah bagi mandi.

MrsNordin said...

Dada,

Bab cuti toilet tak masuk lagi sebab today maid dah balik. Tapi kiranya budak2 tu boleh diharap lah.. tak risaulah kalau nak tinggalkan diaorang sendirian kat rumah.

Yes, we love our work better. I think I'm not cut to be a stay-home mum, not yet at least. Maybe someday later, I don't know.

See you around!

MA said...

Well done Nordinkids!


Actually budak-budak ni semua memang boleh diharap, but our motherly protective and nurturing instincts are always in the way.

And I'd like to think that they too enjoyed the experience as it would make them feel like involved participants of the Nordin's household!

MrsNordin said...

MA,

Yes, you are right!!

tireless mom said...

Dear MrsN

Alhamdulillah. Baik nya your children to take careof the lil one and do the house chores. I forgot how it felt because dah lama tak beranak kecik. Hope you will get the maid replacement soon.

nahiella said...

memang can be blessing in disguise but sekejap je, after that, nak pengsan!!

UrbAnWiTch said...

Mrs.N,
go find Its Complicated, movie baru Meryl Streep..

happy New Year

bella said...

MrsN, Cool!at least now you know that next time you can depend on them. It's also another way of teaching your kids responsibility I think...wowie...(no christmas party ke this year?)

DeeDee said...

Boleh harap dah kakak-kakak ye. Dah boleh kawin dah tu. Hahaha

p/s I always complain that how I wish I can be home to take care of my son, watch him grow etc etc. Tapi bila maid balik seminggu, staying at home buat house chores semua, I dok sibuk kira seconds je bila la boleh return to work and have 'mommy time' ni. Hehe

Superwomanwannabe said...

BJ! MEmang without maid was blissful!

And everyone suddenly knew how to behave kan??

Tapi...penat lah..

maybe if i quit working..?

Still can't do laundry!